Friday, March 28, 2008

Everything is Fixed with Duck Tape.

Batta and I have been upset lately by how things are being run at the school. Moreso, Batta may quit. *sniff*
To start, that kid Owl quit. Duh. Like I didn't see that coming. I am quite thankful that little brat is gone, being that he always felt the need to give (usually incorrect) teaching advice- however, I am sick and tired of helping kids take their black belt test only quit as soon as that belt rests on their waists. I know there is supposedly a difference in rankings between junior and senior ranks, but I'm not seeing it.

Then, there is that talk I had with Head Sensei about what happened at the clinc. He tried to assure me that there was nothing wrong with me- that some of the black belts like to blow smoke out their asses and not to worry about. I realize now that comment made against me was more of an insult to him, but...

And then Batta got injured. He was an uke for kani hasami (flying scissors) and Doppleganger hooked him the wrong way. He nearly broke his clavicle, and I'm quite suprised he didn't seperate his shoulder, but all he did was ligament damage. And yet, Poor Batta, he is more pissed off at not testing for his yellow belt (see me, circa four and half years ago). He's been working with this kid who I'll call Beagle for his trademark dazed and confused look (and lack of attention), who for all intents and purposes, has the learning ability of a squished gnat. He's been there three months and he can't roll, fall, throw a punch, or remember the vocabulary for anything. Who the hell has been teaching him? Oh yeah, that's right- kids.

Wheezy Kid teaching us...I don't want to remember this, so I'm injecting another memory into this blog space. Duck tape. Doppleganger made good on her promise to Batta after he ate a bowl of ice cream and didn't throw up at an aiki clinic, so now batta has duck tape. Quack Quack Quack- little kid black belt don't exist in my world - QUACK QUACK QUACK.

Things I can do with Batta's shiny new roll of duck tape:

  • Make him a new belt
  • make him a sling to match his new belt
  • create a weapon capable of destroying junior students
  • cut it with my sword
  • tape kids' mouths shut
  • tape Wheezy Kid to the ceiling to see if anybody misses him
  • tape closed the gigantic crater that is forming in the cement floor of our school
  • use some of it as an adjustive tool at chiro. schooleat it- it might taste okay

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Baa-baa, black ninja sheep



I am bored in martial arts right now. So here is another update on ranks:

aiki and iai- no change

Karate

me, Lazy Girl, Lurch- ni-kyu

number of total brownies: 4

fuzzy head twins, Tank- purple

number of total people people eaters: 3

Punky, Sarge's kid- green with stripe. Sarge: green

number of total Greenies: 5

Goth kid: yellow

Batta & Skittles: white