Sometimes I think my beagle was a ninjutsu master. How else can she piss on the carpet, eat a shoe sole, and steal my cheese poof on the run in less than a minute? I hate bathing beagles. Despite the fact that I take good care of her, feed her, and pump her ego, she still loves to roll in shit the second she's clean. I'm giving my beagles warrior names today. From now on, my sweetie fat blind beagle Bucket will be called kawaiiomohana, meaning "cute fat nose", for his amazing ability to smell what I ate five minutes ago and cry like a baby. And Pepper will be called sanirokaze, or "three-colored wind", because that's all you see running around the house when she's freaking hyper. The two have their own specialized martial arts moves when it comes to bath time. Bucket's is sumo- being so fat as to being ummovable. Pepper's is catch-me-jutsu. I don't like combating either. Any beagle owners/martial artists who have found the secrets to conquering these techniques, please drop me a note.
By the way, I missed Aiki class tonight. I am bummed out by the boredom and the fact that nobody cared about me having to miss it. It was like, "hmm, well. Too bad". Grrr.
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