I'm bored....

Things have been quite complicated at the dojo. For starters, it seems like every class except iai is exploding with people. I just prefer to keep class small, but alas we are a business. It just annoys me. And then, there is the ranking thing.

I should feel more excited about getting ni-dan, but I don't. I wonder why. I guess it's because there isn't that much difference between dan ranks until you achieve a renshi title or something like that. And the "junior" ni-dan is just a joke. It's literally an extra 2 katas. I always thought it should be more about maturity than memorization. Wheezy Kid forgot ALL of his katas, and is trying to cram before his test. Likewise, Bailout is trying to cram 2+ years of maturity into one month before her ni-dan test. After much thought, although there are no real parameters for junior dan ranks, I can offer my own testing questions in determining whether or not a child is ready for black belt:

1. Can the child tie his own belt? (estimated age: 7 or 8) Foobar fails this one.
2. Have the child's balls dropped yet? (estimated age 11 or 12) Note: you can tell if they have by the pitch of the child's voice. If it sounds like the kid's been sucking helium, or if his voice operates on such a pitch that it alerts every dog in the neighborhood, the answer is no. Foobar and Wheezy Kid fail this one.
3. In the case of a female student, has she begun to wear makeup in such a way that she is NOT mistaken for either a whore or a raccoon (I dunno why a girl would bother wearing makeup to class at all, but that's besides the point)? Snotball fails this one.
4. When the kid does push-ups for warm-ups, do his/her arms actually bend so as to warrant a pushing up of the body at all? Too many people at class fail this one.
5. If the child is going for any dan rank above sho-dan, is he old enough to drive? If not quite yet, can he/she sit in the driver's seat of a car and actually see above the steering wheel? Thing 2 and Wheezy Kid fail this one.
6. Is the child able to put toilet paper, paper towels in the bathroom when they use the last sheet without being reminded to? Everyone fails this one.

I think these are basic, basic rules of responsibility and maturity. There's a lot more, but these are the concerns that pertain to our school. Also note, many adults don't have any sense of responsibility either. If I could have a school, I'd make every older kid have a part-time job so they, not their parents, pay for their weapons. Maybe then they would actually take care of them.