Yuck.

I can't keep my joints together. This is what I have been thinking all week. I'm not sure if it's the stress of everything else in my life, or what, but my body is breaking down without fail. Josie fall down, go boom. Collagen Fail.
Right now that bad big toe is roaring its ugly head. I stubbed it today and now it's all puffy, blue, and sore. I suspect it is left over from June when I hyper-extended it during tai otoshi. I hate the fact that I can't heal. A couple days before, my hip started to hurt, and I had Batta performing a chiro adjustment in the middle of class, with sword weilding onlookers oogling the mirrors for a better look. How embarrassing! It remains to be seen whether or not my lighter weapons plan will actually work- still have to replace my sai and bo, but all in good time.
In an effort to cheer myse;f up, I am going to list things on here that I want to buy this year. Also, this may prevent me from buying other things I don't need, like...other martial arts stuff. :)

what I want for all 2009 holidays, including valentine's, easter, memorial day, birthday, cookie day, and such.

1) a bo case
- because I cannot carry this and look inconspicuous.
-It's also really hard to carry this and a sword case.

2) A jo
-because being an aiki student for 5+ years, i should probably have one of these, no? I mean 31 no Jo is a staple of almost all aiki schools. Except ours


3) this sweet weapons bag from Ronin
- I can stuff EVERYTHING into that. And, it has wheels! :)



4) a baby bulldog
-why not?

Out with the Old, in with the New- Betch-es!

Okay, so with the new year is new problems, Number one, I am broke, Number two, nobody wants to pull their weight anymore. Seriously, how hard is it to replace toilet paper in the bathroom? And how much effort does it take to pick up your own shit? I mean, really now. As the benevolent matriarch/dictator so heavenly put it- "I'm not your mother."

So what is one autistic and bored black belt with one screw loose from her job end up doing? Well, organize a school cleaning event, of course! Now I am in way, way, WAY over my head. Suffice to say, trying to get 50 people to agree to do anything on the same day is turning out to be crazy. But anyway, the bitches gotta clean. That's all there is to it. It's a wonder we all don't have sinus infections from the 4 inches of dust collecting on everything from bos that haven't left the school in 15 years, to jackets of kids that don't go here anymore. Bleh!

And, so it goes. Let's see what has happened since the last entry...Batta and Spam got ranked in karate. Doppelganger is now using tonfa and sucks at it. It's a really alarming thing when Wheezy Kid says, "Dude...I better get outta the way". What else? Oh, Doc gave me Lidocaine patches for my bad hip. Horray for pain management!

"The fairytale is over; welcome to real life!"

In many ways, this quote sums up all that was this past year- thinking that you're finally getting the hang of something, and then, it all screws you over.

A lot of things have happened since I left. Many are not too terribly surprising- Wheezy Kid throwing his tonfa repeatedly into the wall, Goth kid cutting the "nice new floor", etc. There have been some good things. Big T and his family came back. That was cool. Overall, this is what I call a "rebuilding year".

I've been trying to fight the negativity and roll with the punches as best I can. I've been going over a lot of new katas, and in the process, I'm actually starting to learn something. Some of the new katas include a bo kata, a tonfa kata, one empt hand kata, and a sword kata called Junto. I have been spending more time on karate thanks to my black belt test this year, and though it wasn't a total waste, I've let things go. I haven't worked sword as much as I've wanted to, and aiki...don't even get me started.

The biggest thing I've learned is that black belt really doesn't mean shit unless you have a big head about it (in which case, you being sucking). Doppelganger has developed a sassy mouth that will soon get her punched out by a ten year old in Japan, as she is going to study there. The problems I have with her are compounded by the fact that she actually thinks she's on par with the bigger students in class (because, clearly, rank is an ultimate indication of skill). The problem with this line of thought is she's a crybaby that can't do pushups or falls....kinda like....Wheezy Kid. So the battle continues over what a black belt actually should be, but I also know I can proscribe to higher pursuits than whining about getting tapped in sparring or being forced to do a proper pushup. My goal is to raise a whole bunch of yellow, orange, and green belts (and possibly a foxhound) that can kick all the kiddie's asses. Sweet, sweet revenge. Yum.

I'm going to set up some training goals for myself this year.

• I want to be able to do ten good pull-ups easily.

• I'd like to do 30 military pushups. Right now I can do 12 max.


• I want to practice with my sword at least 4 times a week, my bo 6 times a week, and my tonfa 3 times a week.


• I want to learn and polish the eku kata enough to take it to a tournament.


• I want to spar more with Batta.

And, as always, I have listed my New Year's Predictions:

• Most likely to quit in the coming year- Lurch


• Most likely to get a bitchslap from me- A girl that is related (kinda) to Thing 1 and 2, but instead of calling her Thing 3, I will call her Snotball.


• The people I'd like to see get ranked- Batta, yes, but also Sarge


• Coolest thing that could happen to the school- a massive cleanout of upper ranked children


• The winners of the "you still suck" award will be- Happy sensei, Wheezy Kid, etc.

I have named some new people these past few months; one of which I said was Snotball. She has a friend, I call her Snotshadow. This girl can't think for herself when Snotball isn't there, so hence the name. I have a kid I'll call Meatball...for obvious reasons. I actually like Meatball. He reminds me kids are supposed to have a soul. Then there is Sprinkles, Grumpy, and Lil' Stein (Frankenstein's brother)- al yellow-bellies at the moment. There's a new adult white belt which I will call Poofball, but don't honestly think she will stay. And then....there is Delusional Man. He thinks he is God's gift to martial arts, despite the fact he hasn't trained in 20 years. No nothing changes in that amount of time...like you're now 40...and slow...and overweight. We also have a VERY big guy in aiki...who I have mentioned before but rarely, as he is huge. He dwarfs Semi, so I have call him...what's bigger than a semi?...Cruiseship.

So that's basically it for now. Long entry, sorry. But you know, that's how I roll. Mmm, cookie batter rolls.

UPDATE ON RANK

iai

• ni-dan- me, Things 1 and 2

• sho-dan- Doc, Goth Kid


• san-kyu- Batta


• yonkyu- Spam


• mu- Delusional Man

aiki ( I have to remind myself what the hell is going on here, because I'm not sure ANYONE knows who ranks where)

• sho-dan- Benevolent Matriarch/Dictator

• Ikkyu- me


• ni-kyu- Goth Kid


• san kyu (?)- Semi


• yonkyu- Goofy (Semi's buddy), Sarge, Batta, Things 1 and 2


• mu- several kids who float in and out of the class when they feel like it

karate

• shodan- me and Doppleganger


• baby nidan ('cause, let's face it, a kid capable of "ni dan" level needs to be on an adult book) - Thing 1 and 2


• baby shodan- Frankenstein, Lurch, Wheezy Kid


• brown- (what the hell did I name that kid? how about...Foobar)


• Purple with stripe- Sarge's Kid


• Purple- Snotball and Snotshadow


• Green with Stripe- Little T


• Green- Big T, Goth kid


• Orange- Batta


• Yellow- Sprinkles, Lil' Stein, Grumpy, Meatball


• White- Spam, Delusional Man, Poofball, and (what the hell should I name Doppelganger's guy, hm? How about...) Pizza the Hut